Monday, July 9, 2007

Anger and Love

Two Sides of the Same Coin
I read a very interesting article about anger, and this quote jumped out at me;
"If you really want love in your life, you must be willing to spend a little time with love's less comfortable relatives, anger and pain. It's common to think that with anger and pain come breakup and divorce. But the bottom line is the more you love someone, the more able they are to piss you off. So be aware: Anger and intense emotion are normal when you truly love and care."
First of all, the song "The More You Ruv Someone" is running rampant through my head (which reminds me, I used to have that sheet music book, and someone borrowed it and never gave it back... poo). Secondly, what an excellent point that people completely neglect to acknowledge. Just because you don't enjoy something at that moment doesn't mean it is not worthwhile. You can't expect people (or jobs, or money, or sex, or anything else) to make you happy and leave you with only good feelings. Without the bad feelings, what are the good ones worth? Not much.
Brad and I have gotten quite good at constructive conflict. It is almost never pleasant to fight, but if it fixes a problem than it is necessary and good. It increases our bond and makes our love and trust grow deeper in one another.
It just makes me think of people who close their hearts because of their past experiences. It is natural to want to guard your heart after it has been smashed, but if you avoid the bad so diligently, you are likely to miss out on the good. You need to learn how to protect yourself from loneliness as well.
"Feelings are much like waves. We can't stop them from coming, but we can choose which one to surf." -Jonatan Mårtensson

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